Monday, June 18, 2012
Monday, June 11, 2012
Monday, June 4, 2012
The Bachelorette S8E4 Live Blog
A nasty cold sidelined us both the past two weeks so we missed live blogging the episode last week. That isn't to say we didn't have plenty of snarky things to say in between coughing fits. So glad Shelly hit the road, can't believe Kalon stayed on, glad to say that Stevie is gone too. And seriously Tony? Time to buy some stock in Kleenex. On to the exciting night that is all the bungee jumping fun happening somewhere that isn't South Carolina.
Monday, May 21, 2012
DWTS: The Finals
3 finalists are left in this finals episode with the winning couple announced on tomorrow's (likely far too long) finale.
William Levy & Cheryl Burke
Dance 1:
William is sex on legs, according to Bruno, who touched William every chance he had in that last little advice session. They dance to a poorly performed Raise Your Glass karaoke and the couple does ok, I guess. I get why William is at the top, but I also get that it isn't because he's the strongest dancer. I swear you can see him count steps in his head through half his dances. They get a 10 from Carrie, a 10 from Len and a 10 from Bruno for a perfect 30. If I wasn't sitting here with a sore throat, I'd totally be yelling at how drunk those judges must have been tonight. They weren't awful by any means, but a 30?
Dance 2:
The freestyle dance - of course William's shirt MUST be ripped off. I'm not complaining about the sights I'm seeing but the predictability of it all. I love how Cheryl is all business and William is grinning like a 12 year old boy. Kind of cute. And man, is his wife gorgeous or what? You can't even hear Len over all the screaming. Even he called it predictable. I'm in trouble if I'm starting to sound like Len. My kids call him the Unreasonable Judge. Bruno of course was drooling at the mouth, as well Carrie. Tens from the last two and a 9 from Len for a total score of 59 for the night.
Katherine Jenkins & Mark Ballas
Dance 1:
Len gets sent in to coach these two for the finals episode. She's hoping for her first Len Ten if she follows his every direction. I'm liking the way Katherine's skirt was made to move during that first dance. They did ok too. I guess these aren't my favorite performances. Maybe they're all just super nervous but I've seen them each dance a bit better earlier in the season. They also get a perfect score and Katherine gets her Len Ten.
Dance 2:
Their freestyle is going to be a mix of everything with Mark begging Katherine not to make so many grunting noises as she dances. I'm ready to give them a ten just seconds into it. I swear she will be robbed if she doesn't walk away from the trophy this season. The judges agree with me and they get a perfect score all around - a 60 out of 60 for the night.
Donald Driver & Peta Murgatroyd
Dance 1:
Carrie Ann heads over to coach these two for this last week. She also looks like she's having an embarrassing physical reaction as the two dancers rehearse. She's very into it. Dancing to a Jem song? I'm already loving it. Though I haven't hated anything Peta has danced to yet this season. Not a bad dance from these two. They haven't been my favorite this season but of the three couples remaining, he has shown the most improvement. Len still isn't giving him a ten after those comments. Carried raved, Bruno was complimentary. I'm guessing they won't get a perfect ten like the two couples before them. Yep, no ten from Len. 29 out of 30 with tens from the other two judges. I was starting to think the judges were only given those 10 paddles for tonight's judging.
Dance 2:
Country has never looked so green or yellow. Go Packers! My soon-to-be brother-in-law would be so proud. They've decided to do some line dancing for their freestyle dance. I think Donald really does better with dances like these that are more mainstream, like the dance with both girls a few weeks ago - that was the best dance of the season of all the couples! I am amazed she didn't get more than a bloody lip with all that violent swinging her head at the ground. The judges loved it so much that Carrie Ann was dancing on the table. Will he FINALLY get his ten from Len?? And there it is!!! He got his perfect score! They match William and Cheryl's score of 59, tying for second place for the night.
Results tomorrow night...
My bet is on Katherine and Mark!
William Levy & Cheryl Burke
Dance 1:
William is sex on legs, according to Bruno, who touched William every chance he had in that last little advice session. They dance to a poorly performed Raise Your Glass karaoke and the couple does ok, I guess. I get why William is at the top, but I also get that it isn't because he's the strongest dancer. I swear you can see him count steps in his head through half his dances. They get a 10 from Carrie, a 10 from Len and a 10 from Bruno for a perfect 30. If I wasn't sitting here with a sore throat, I'd totally be yelling at how drunk those judges must have been tonight. They weren't awful by any means, but a 30?
Dance 2:
The freestyle dance - of course William's shirt MUST be ripped off. I'm not complaining about the sights I'm seeing but the predictability of it all. I love how Cheryl is all business and William is grinning like a 12 year old boy. Kind of cute. And man, is his wife gorgeous or what? You can't even hear Len over all the screaming. Even he called it predictable. I'm in trouble if I'm starting to sound like Len. My kids call him the Unreasonable Judge. Bruno of course was drooling at the mouth, as well Carrie. Tens from the last two and a 9 from Len for a total score of 59 for the night.
Katherine Jenkins & Mark Ballas
Dance 1:
Len gets sent in to coach these two for the finals episode. She's hoping for her first Len Ten if she follows his every direction. I'm liking the way Katherine's skirt was made to move during that first dance. They did ok too. I guess these aren't my favorite performances. Maybe they're all just super nervous but I've seen them each dance a bit better earlier in the season. They also get a perfect score and Katherine gets her Len Ten.
Dance 2:
Their freestyle is going to be a mix of everything with Mark begging Katherine not to make so many grunting noises as she dances. I'm ready to give them a ten just seconds into it. I swear she will be robbed if she doesn't walk away from the trophy this season. The judges agree with me and they get a perfect score all around - a 60 out of 60 for the night.
Donald Driver & Peta Murgatroyd
Dance 1:
Carrie Ann heads over to coach these two for this last week. She also looks like she's having an embarrassing physical reaction as the two dancers rehearse. She's very into it. Dancing to a Jem song? I'm already loving it. Though I haven't hated anything Peta has danced to yet this season. Not a bad dance from these two. They haven't been my favorite this season but of the three couples remaining, he has shown the most improvement. Len still isn't giving him a ten after those comments. Carried raved, Bruno was complimentary. I'm guessing they won't get a perfect ten like the two couples before them. Yep, no ten from Len. 29 out of 30 with tens from the other two judges. I was starting to think the judges were only given those 10 paddles for tonight's judging.
Dance 2:
Country has never looked so green or yellow. Go Packers! My soon-to-be brother-in-law would be so proud. They've decided to do some line dancing for their freestyle dance. I think Donald really does better with dances like these that are more mainstream, like the dance with both girls a few weeks ago - that was the best dance of the season of all the couples! I am amazed she didn't get more than a bloody lip with all that violent swinging her head at the ground. The judges loved it so much that Carrie Ann was dancing on the table. Will he FINALLY get his ten from Len?? And there it is!!! He got his perfect score! They match William and Cheryl's score of 59, tying for second place for the night.
Results tomorrow night...
My bet is on Katherine and Mark!
Jay's Top Players on the Bachelorette
Elle and I have this thing about picking the Bachelorette winner (or any other competition-based show winner) right from the get-go. I've been pretty good at this, but haven't been correct every single time. I'm going to show my top picks here in no real particular order, but I do have some strategy to my selection. My top 8 are as follows (I'll identify my top 3 within these as I go):
Stevie, the Real Green Lantern:
The guy knows how to make an entrance... maybe the kind of entrance that appeals to high school girls, but still worthy of ratings if he's kept around. I can't knock the guy for having a youthful spirit, but we'll see if he can be a man when the time calls for it. P.S. I think his fav color is green.
Ryan, aka Shovel-Face:
Alright, I suppose it may be a bit harsh to call someone "Shovel-Face" but I'm seriously jealous of this guy's chin. It's like superhero-chiseled. In fact, I'm confident that this man's chin has been used to forge actual chisels. He seemed like an okay guy, so I'll cut him some slack in the future.
Arie, aka Speed Racer:
I'm taking a chance with Arie... I actually think he's pretty cool, but I'm concerned that sooner or later he will do something that will bring back a bad memory for Emily. I predict she will fall for him about half-way before she runs for the hills. Sorry Arie, for what it's worth, I'm still rooting for ya. I'm still putting you in my top 3.
Joe, aka Matthew McConna-Heeeey
Alright alright... Joe seems suave and I'm sure he'll go far. He was a close contender for the top 3, but I think Emily will soon find out that he's an impersonator by night. Real Matthew McConaughey fact: he chooses not to wear deodorant or anti-perspiration products. Let's hope Joe doesn't take his impersonations too far or Emily's going to smell disaster.
Chris, aka Bobble-head:
I wasn't prepared to give Bobble-head a fair chance when he pulled out the dolls, but Emily seemed to go for it. Is it just me, or was that whole scene kinda creepy? I know Elle thought so as well. Could our Bachelorette be kinda crazy-cakes? If so, Chris could be the perfect match... still not top 3 though.
Charlie aka Winner:
I'm calling it right now... as long as there isn't some hidden catastrophe lurking about Charlie, I think he's going to win. He's level-headed, understands what it's like to experience bad times, and he's cool. I would hang out with him for sure - not in a bromance type of way, but if the guy was in the same room as me, he wouldn't stick out like that freak with the ostrich egg. Keep it real Charlie (top 1 of the top 3).
Jef (with one "f") aka Sk8r:
His hair couldn't fit into my picture most likely due to how fast he goes on his skateboard. A true skater at heart, Jef knows that chicks dig scars, and bones heal. Sk8r can come off as a bad-ass to some ladies, but as the spelling of his name suggests, I feel like something is lacking. I hope Jef proves me wrong because I think he has potential.
Kalon, aka Helicopter Guy:
Can you say pretentious? Helicopter guy can. He's a legend in his own mind and subscribes to the belief that Turkish Delight spills from every single one of his orifices. The guy is too much, which makes him perfect for my final pick for top 3. I have a feeling we will have a lot to say about helicopter guy. I would wage that the producers of the show begged Emily to keep him around for pure entertainment value.
Those are my top picks... I think these guys will be around for a while. I hope we can get some interactive commentary tonight at 9:00 p.m. PST. Thanks for reading!
Stevie, the Real Green Lantern:
The guy knows how to make an entrance... maybe the kind of entrance that appeals to high school girls, but still worthy of ratings if he's kept around. I can't knock the guy for having a youthful spirit, but we'll see if he can be a man when the time calls for it. P.S. I think his fav color is green.
Ryan, aka Shovel-Face:
Alright, I suppose it may be a bit harsh to call someone "Shovel-Face" but I'm seriously jealous of this guy's chin. It's like superhero-chiseled. In fact, I'm confident that this man's chin has been used to forge actual chisels. He seemed like an okay guy, so I'll cut him some slack in the future.
Arie, aka Speed Racer:
I'm taking a chance with Arie... I actually think he's pretty cool, but I'm concerned that sooner or later he will do something that will bring back a bad memory for Emily. I predict she will fall for him about half-way before she runs for the hills. Sorry Arie, for what it's worth, I'm still rooting for ya. I'm still putting you in my top 3.
Joe, aka Matthew McConna-Heeeey
Alright alright... Joe seems suave and I'm sure he'll go far. He was a close contender for the top 3, but I think Emily will soon find out that he's an impersonator by night. Real Matthew McConaughey fact: he chooses not to wear deodorant or anti-perspiration products. Let's hope Joe doesn't take his impersonations too far or Emily's going to smell disaster.
Chris, aka Bobble-head:
I wasn't prepared to give Bobble-head a fair chance when he pulled out the dolls, but Emily seemed to go for it. Is it just me, or was that whole scene kinda creepy? I know Elle thought so as well. Could our Bachelorette be kinda crazy-cakes? If so, Chris could be the perfect match... still not top 3 though.
Charlie aka Winner:
I'm calling it right now... as long as there isn't some hidden catastrophe lurking about Charlie, I think he's going to win. He's level-headed, understands what it's like to experience bad times, and he's cool. I would hang out with him for sure - not in a bromance type of way, but if the guy was in the same room as me, he wouldn't stick out like that freak with the ostrich egg. Keep it real Charlie (top 1 of the top 3).
Jef (with one "f") aka Sk8r:
His hair couldn't fit into my picture most likely due to how fast he goes on his skateboard. A true skater at heart, Jef knows that chicks dig scars, and bones heal. Sk8r can come off as a bad-ass to some ladies, but as the spelling of his name suggests, I feel like something is lacking. I hope Jef proves me wrong because I think he has potential.
Kalon, aka Helicopter Guy:
Can you say pretentious? Helicopter guy can. He's a legend in his own mind and subscribes to the belief that Turkish Delight spills from every single one of his orifices. The guy is too much, which makes him perfect for my final pick for top 3. I have a feeling we will have a lot to say about helicopter guy. I would wage that the producers of the show begged Emily to keep him around for pure entertainment value.
Those are my top picks... I think these guys will be around for a while. I hope we can get some interactive commentary tonight at 9:00 p.m. PST. Thanks for reading!
The Bachelorette S8E1 Recap
The Bachelor/Bachelorette, like Keeping Up With The Kardashians, is one of those shows we love to hate. It's predictable and mostly ridiculous with girls acting like football fans behind a tv screen, yelling at people who can't hear them. Or in this case, gossiping with friends in person, by text or email about how we would never be that catty or whatever. Ironic, I know.
Emily is up in this seasons' The Bachelorette to find true love. Again. First, she found love with Brad Womack who won his second chance at the show after he refused to choose either of the women in his first Bachelor season. When he was given a second chance at the show (and love, of course), he picked Emily. They spent more than a few months fighting in person and long distance since she lived in NC and he lived somewhere else (see how much I care?). Finally, they broke up and now she's ready for love again!
Emily is sweet, southern and beautiful. She's a single mom with a tragic history. Seriously, hers is the first "sob" story presented on The Bachelor/Bachelorette series that makes me want to cry real tears. Her race car driving fiance died in a plane crash on the way to a race and a few days after the accident, Emily discovers she's pregnant. Years later, she's here at ABC to find love and a daddy for her daughter and future babies.
Keeping Up With The Kardashians: Who's Your Daddy?
Scott has an awesome new mustache. Mason can talk like the cutie pie he is and Kourtney says she feels wider than ever, pregnant with her second baby.
The new season of KUWTK is here!
Bruce missed dinner with the family because he fell asleep watching tv and he's upset no one came to get him. Kris says she left him alone because
Khloe is being pressured by her mom to get a DNA test to prove the paternity of her father. She has no desire to do it, but Kris swears the story won't go away until Khloe takes the test - never mind that this is a story Kris put out there, but who cares about the details. Kris "knows" it's something Khloe really needs to do to feel complete, so Kris takes things into her own hands. What a shocking turn of events.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Billboard Music Awards
Come hang out on our couch and join us two old folks who don't even know half of the artists on the show tonight. Yep. We're that old.
Monday, May 14, 2012
The Bachelorette S8E1: Premiere Night!
Jay: "What has two thumbs and is going to marry Emily? This Guy!" -Tony
Jay: "I want babies!"
Jay: run guys!
Elle: Coming late to the party. Why run? You have two sweet babies downstairs asleep (finally) right now.
Elle: and here come the men...
Elle: sean - totally thought he was going in for a kiss already
Elle: and another hug...wow eager fella
Jay: "I want babies!"
Jay: run guys!
Elle: Coming late to the party. Why run? You have two sweet babies downstairs asleep (finally) right now.
Elle: and here come the men...
Elle: sean - totally thought he was going in for a kiss already
Elle: and another hug...wow eager fella
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